College Culture Bothers Me Sometimes

"Monday nights starting at 7 PM everyone you know is invited to our weekly open house/discussion group over tea and hookah.

Holy smokes is a community of contemporary thinkers dedicated to seeking truth in our world.
We believe in the importance of open-minded thinking and the wisdom found in diversity as we discuss social issues and philosophy

We seek to ask the difficult questions and to find the answers to them.

We meet every Monday night @ Grace House in the basement... Bring a hookah! Bring a beverage! Bring an opinion! Bring an open mind and most of all bring a friend!!"

Okay. I know I'm ragging on a group of people who are almost certainly discussing more important and pertinent issues than I do on an average Monday, but...come off it. I'm fine with twentysomethings grappling with big questions - college is the time to do that. People won't think you're an idiot, and most importantly you won't feel too embarrassed for saying stuff like "if the universe were a salad, Earth wouldn't even make up a grain of pepper." And I love those late-night conversations about the "deep issues" as much as the next person, I really do.

But Christ almighty does it bug me that people consciously refer to themselves as "contemporary thinkers." Because that term implies two things - one is that being a contemporary thinker is a good, worthy cause and not just "lazy, but I make good conversation," and by extension, that you are awesome for being one. What does that even mean? "So what do you do?" "Oh, well, you know, I THINK. I mean, the world is full of people who DO, but I, see, I really stop and take the time to think about what's going on out there, you know?"

(and trust me, i do get the irony here, because i myself am incredibly lazy and spend most of my time thinking about and discussing useless stuff, but to my credit, i acknowledge this and have never tried to pass myself off as more than i am, though terms like "cultural columnist" have floated through my head at one point or another)

And don't get me started on hookah, perhaps the lamest trend since Pokemon cards. I can't tell you how many times I've had to explain to people that "some dude" is probably not a good authority on how harmful the effects of smoking are. "But I heard that the water absorbs the nicotine!" Argh. You can always sell things to hippies by making sure to mention that it's "Eastern" or "herbal" though...preferably both. "This isn't like those Western cigarettes...this tastes like cherry."

And I'm not even anti-smoker. If you're dumb enough to smoke, God bless. Just don't do it around me (I have enough things trying to kill me on any given day), and don't try to pass it off as something that makes you cooler or more cultured than you are - you only sound dumber.

Sorry for the rant, it's already a long day and I still have a ten-pager due for Tuesday that I'm avoiding getting started on. I did bowl a 144 last night though, and I haven't been since last summer, if we even bowled then...I can't remember.